At some point along the way I stopped trying, stopped listening to that call deep within. I’d managed to convince myself that God wasn’t calling me to the priesthood, or at least that I’d decided not to respond. I gave in to the way of life where drinking became the focus, with the weekend starting on Thursday or maybe even Wednesday. There was partying and smoking and women, girlfriends and giving in to the passions and desires. And I got to a point where it was a lot of fun, even though I knew that it wasn’t me. Yet, it was how I was living. I was trying to prove that I didn’t deserve to be called to the priesthood. I didn’t deserve to be called His son.