I know I am unbelievably lucky. I really do. My loves are not dying. They are funny, clever, kind, and caring people who despite all of the above, I adore. There is no one I would rather be with. There is no one I would rather be a mum to and definitely no one I would rather be married to… most days. I recognise that I am incredibly fortunate to be able to access the services they need, both financially and logistically. I know all this. It’s just that sometimes I need to have a pity party and let it all out or else I really fear my head will literally explode.