Good luck on your personal journey. You are not alone in this many others have travelt this path, trust in the Lord to lead you in his timing. Over the past few years good friends of mine went through this process, in the end, after many stuggles they decided to adopt, and and are now blessed with a precious little boy. God will guide you on your journey may he be you in the days ahead. You and Erik will be great parents, and your little blessing will be a great future cowboy or girl,,🤠🙏